MUDDY COWS

by Godber, John

Scarfield Ladies Rugby Union FC have a tough time attracting enough members to turn out a full team most weeks, despite the best efforts of their captain Maggie. Forced to use tyres and oil drums for training, there’s not even enough money for their own team shirts, and when promised sponsorship doesn’t come through it looks like the writing is on the wall for the women’s rugby team. Even local fundraising efforts don’t look capable of keeping the team alive much longer but just as the team are facing their darkest hour and Maggie considers throwing in the towel, the girls hit on the idea of entering a ladie’s rugby Sevens competition with thousands of pounds on offer to the winners.
A disastrous night camping to save money the night before the competition sees the team arrive in terrible shape to play, which is only compounded by the conditions of their changing room. Seeing off three teams in succession as conditions gradually worsen, they discover that their final match will be a playoff against an invited team of professional women’s rugby players from New Zealand, Tonga and Samoa . . . what chance can the Scarfield Ladies possibly have to win the tournament against such fierce opposition?
“There’s discord and heartbreak, but it is leavened by sardonic, refreshingly bruising wit. Indeed this is Godber’s consistently funniest play . . .” - The Stage

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